My child, listen to your father's teaching and do not forget your mother's advice. Proverbs 1:8 NCV
One might assume that when our parents leave this life, our responsibility to honor is finished. Not so. Their passing opens a whole new pathway for honor that will help us and our own future generations. We honor our parents after their passing …
By the way we talk about them. Every word we say either honors or dishonors. It also teaches our children how to honor us with words.
By processing our memories well. If we are authentic and truthful, memories can be a mixed bag. We hurt each other sometimes, and some of us have experienced great hurt from our parents. We honor them and give the best future to ourselves and our children as we acknowledge the hurt, get counseling if necessary, forgive them, and release them. Then we can choose to be grateful for the fact that even the most flawed parents gave us life, then find positive things to remember. Your beautiful blue eyes that are the source of many compliments might have come from a mother who had a sharp and critical tongue. Choose gratitude. If you have primarily good memories, share those memories whenever you can with your family.
By living a life of character and integrity. Live in such a way that your family name is honored by those who know you. Even if your parents didn’t manage their name as well as you wish, you can go a long way toward redeeming the family name for them and your children and grandchildren by the way you live.
By knowing, honoring, and sharing your family story. As you study biblical history, you will see that it was the custom to recall family histories and exploits. There are several dozen genealogies or family trees listed in the Bible. Individuals and families recalled the traits of their parents and grandparents, especially their faith. I am personally very thankful for all I learned from my parents, the way they lived and loved and shared their faith. I tell about them so much to my grandchildren that they can share many things about these great people themselves. They left a legacy I want to pass on to my children and grandchildren.
By gaining wisdom from their successes and mistakes. Many of the wisest people you will ever know are already gone. Your parents’ lives can impart much wisdom to you as you reflect on their decisions and how they dealt with heartache and success. 1 Corinthians 10:11 tells that the history of their forefathers was written for the Israelites so they could benefit from it. We honor our parents when we take their experiences seriously and learn.
If they were followers of Jesus, we honor our parents by following their example and being ready for our future every day. We honor them when we are sure that our children know there is a family circle cheering for them to live for Jesus and live with joy.
- Jesus, help me genuinely honor my parents and by trusting You and Your plan.